Author: Staff | Source: Catholic.net
At this time it is urgent to understand that the origin of the social problems of our time (drug addiction, prostitution, alcoholism, homosexuality, prostitution, etc.), have their origin in the lack of love that people experience in the family. Depending on whether we are parents or children, we can ask ourselves in reference to this aspect: what is the experience of love or affection that you give or receive in your family? Do you feel loved? Do you think you transmit enough affection to your children?
When you get on the path of reconciliation of the emotional wounds that are part of the attraction for the same sex (AMS), you have to assume the overwhelming consequences of the lack of effect from your parents. In my experience, I must admit that the wound of love is transmitted from father to son in a generational way, since a child who does not receive love will be a father who will not give it either, until someone feels strongly affected and decides to break with that cycle of emotional wounds. I experienced an emotionally distant and absent father very much despite living close to me, missed the best moments of my life where he could have been meaningfully affirming to me, and giving me the moment of close father-son relationship that I needed in my development. When I stopped being a child and became an adult, the wounded child that I carried inside began to ask me to meet those licit needs for affection and love in other males, as an adult and carrying the ghost of abuse, my inner hurt child began the quest to cover that need eroticizing men, when in reality, what I needed from them supposed the affection I was looking for from my father. On the path of reconciliation of my emotional wounds, the understanding of the deep need for affection meant a moment of important progress in my process of reconciling my unwanted sexual attraction to men. It was for this reason that there was no experience of fullness with any person, since I tried in the wrong way to fill with sex, a deep need for affection.
In the person that’s emotionally wounded and with breakdowns in their sexuality, the need for affection is experienced in the following ways: they are anxious to feel appreciated; they feel deeply frustrated with any lack, real or imagined, of affection or esteem. When you experience yourself that way, you may feel that your value as a person declines, you tend to see yourself less valuable with the rest, as meaningless. Have you ever felt this way? If you have experienced it, I encourage you to ask your injured inner child what is it that he really needs to be calm? Probably what you are giving him until now the only thing he does is to make the wound bigger and increase the moments of sexual breakdown, which together with your own belief system generates a feeling of emptiness and guilt.
Whoever has a love-affection wound with his earthly father, is unable to assimilate God as a Father of Love and Mercy, this is unfortunate especially if we understand that, above all, God is a Father of Love. You have had the experience of a father on Earth hard and emotionally distant or absent it is logical that this wound causes that effect of aversion also towards God.
When I began my reconciliation process, one of the things that made me cry a long time was to realize that throughout my life, every moment, even in the traumatic abuses I suffered, God loved me and in some way suffered with me those moments. So strong, it was a long road until I managed to restructure the image of God as my Father and accept that he loves me very much and that there is no sin or break so great that He cannot drown in a sea of forgiveness. I decided to believe God and accept that he has the power to make all things new and today I am here writing part of my testimony, to affirm that God is "the Love that Heals."