A Great Life Concert
Author: Emili Avilés Cutillas | Source: Catholic.net
We all know that communication is more than talking and listening. In human treatment, communication is, first and foremost, an irreplaceable mean to reach the truth. It is key to solve the problems that may arise, in the most diverse personal and relationship circumstances.
Speaking and agreeing is, as far as the family is concerned, a precious instrument to facilitate love, involving the closest ones to one's own feelings, one's own needs, joys, expectations and hopes.
We are aware that a certain harmony is necessary to strengthen and progress in daily coexistence. Well, to understand each other we have to ensure two issues. On the one hand, "want-seek" an effective knowledge of reality, know things as they are. And on the other hand, a respectful recognition of the dignity of other people, over prejudices and particularisms.
It happens that now, only the automatic, the fast, the immediate is considered good. But, let's not forget that in family communication and among people who we appreciate, there is a logic of time and space that takes us much further. We have to learn to know how to wait for reflection, give time to a response, to an improvement, to a free and responsible decision. That, even on a small matter, is coexistence training, it is tenderness and warm presence.
This is how the need to put the work of home and family in great value, to strive for a prudent and generous division of tasks, to avoid sexist and feminist stereotypes, emerges more than ever. Love ahead of what the other needs, understand their differences, love or love it in its entirety.
For example, if a wife understands the lack of material order of the husband, it means that she will help him to improve, she says it, she has patience and even smiles when she sees the efforts he makes. Identical attitude towards the development of virtues in the children, will facilitate in them the real, spontaneous, pleasant, sports improvement; with effort, of course.
In the itinerary of love it is certain that difficulties appear. It can happen that someone goes though a phase of special health complications, mood, work, etcetera.
But, since the love of truth is centered on the other person, we can not be oblivious to any matter that affects, little or much, to that other person.
The truth that must be in love, becomes a lie if there is neglect to know how he or she is doing, if we disengage from how they interpret the actions or data that they receive from us. Refining in the understanding of the "team" is daily occupation. And sometimes, you may need extra efforts to avoid fixations and susceptibilities.
It is also true that, in certain moments and circumstances, some grief or some absence will give us an impulse of good reflection. They will motivate us to return, with a tender wink, shared love and hope.
Let's not doubt that one can, and must, find ways to fall in love again with one's wife or husband. It is urgent to open communication channels. It is true that there are periods of sentimental dryness, but precisely these are what make love more mature, because we will work better feelings and passions. Thus, reason attracts us to want more and more, with all the person, body, affection and will.
But, in any case, we discover the boyfriend or girlfriend that we all have inside. Let's cultivate again those long appointments, fasting from anyone else. This will make it easier for us to be more men and women, to later become better fathers, mothers, wives and husbands.
On the other hand, it is worth remembering that marital love is not a moment, a static fact in the lives of people. It is a developing state, which evolves. So much so that true love is growing. The time that goes by and the tests through which love passes, make it clearer, make it cleaner and higher. It is a love in love, even with great passions, whole love.
The couple's relationship is reinforced by overcoming and channeling tensions, forgiving and learning to forgive. For this, it is essential to establish stable habits of sincere treatment. Let us facilitate our spouse to explain their opinion, their concerns, that the problems that may arise are the object of study, not of discussion, that we will move on to change or rectify. That is a good starting point for the rectification of the husband or wife. And always, the forgetfulness of self and the loving acceptance of the other.
God willing that, every day, we all learn a little more to come. And that, from the tensions, like the good musical instruments, we get great harmony.